This just in courtesy of email:
The O.P.P. are cracking down on speeders heading into Toronto For the first offense, they give you two Toronto Maple Leaf tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.
Nuk! Nuk!
Garden Gnome
©2006-2008
I received the following cute story in my email. I have taken the liberty of using a different puppy image.
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An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard; I could tell
from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was
well taken care of.
He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head;
he then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the
hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep.
An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.
The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour. This continued off and on for several weeks.
Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'
The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar: 'He lives in a home with 6 children, 2 under the age of 3 - he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?'
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Garden Gnome
©2006-2008
Yesterday:
Seriously I am right on schedule for doing nothing! We were up at the crack of dawn, had the car packed and out the door. As with all plans things change and often quite quickly. An hour or so later we are back home with my husband figuring out our next move (long irritating story) while I dropped on EC blogs. He could have been at the office making money! Anyway, I looked through my canning book then hunkered down to be busy doing nothing. I was feeling horrid more like death warmed over anyway so doing nothing sounds just fine with me. I even considered combining doing nothing with doing diddly squat but that would be multi-tasking and I was determined to just do nothing without any ADD tendencies getting in the way.
Looking at the clock it is now just after 10 PM. I think I have successfully done nothing today give or take a few glitches of doing something kicking in. The sky didn't fall and the house didn't collapse even though I did nothing. The laundry is still sitting there and the produce is waiting to be canned. I tried to focus on the political issues at hand but that really didn't fit in with doing nothing. So I turned the tv to the comedy shows and started laughing. Then I realized that was actually doing something when my goal was to do nothing. So I cuddled up on the couch with the tv in the background and tried drifting off to sleep. Again I was doing something. Seriously, doing nothing is a heck of a lot harder and a lot more work than it would appear!
I've decided to dedicate a substantial amount of time to researching the finer art of doing nothing. I even put it on my to do list right under the have a nervous breakdown as soon as I have time if I can remember where the heck my nerves are in the first place.
Garden Gnome
©2006-2008
For the past just shy of two weeks I have been processing tomatoes into various tomato products for us to enjoy until the next tomato season. So far I have processed 9 hampers and if the weather holds I will be processing two or three more. The tomatoes are free thanks to a family member who grows commercially and in addition to what we grow. We are also on a road trip that will afford me the wonderful opportunity to bring home an abundance of fresh produce to put up. It's going to be a very busy week!
I can't stress how very blessed we are to live in an area where local produce is not only abundant but also inexpensive. So many folks have to pay outrageous prices for fresh produce and so many folks are struggling to pay the rising food costs. Each time I put more jars of home canned foods into our walk-in pantry I am reminded to be very, very thankful that we have the skills to put up food for the coming year as well as the opportunity and means. I can rest easy knowing that I can provide for my husband and myself as well as our grown kids and the grandbabies. That is a really good feeling. It is a true blessing to be able to see your food stores and know you have enough not only for yourselves but to help out others.
Garden Gnome
©2006-2008
To Be 6 Again...
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife,
looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he
asked what she'd like to have for her Birthday.
'I'd like to be six again,' she replied, still looking in the
mirror.
On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice
big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park.
What a day!
He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall
of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was.
Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head
was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.
He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy
Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her
favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled
home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over
his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it
like being six again??'
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. 'I
meant my dress size, you dumb ass!'
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is
gonna get it wrong.
-- author unknown
Garden Gnome
©2006-2008
